Twins Acquisitions and Bad Holiday Ambience

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. In this edition I'll be briefly going over the new Twins trades and the most dreaded part of the Christmas season.

Item 1: I think already, in the last 4 weeks, Bill Smith has been busier than Terry Ryan has in the last four years. We have traded two guys that our former GM would probably never have traded (Garza & Bartlett) and brought in one hot young player (Young) and two serviceable infielders who, while not superstars are certainly a cut above Tony Batista and Juan Castro (I speak of former-Astros Adam Everett and Mike Lamb). So, theoretical lineups here we go:

1. Alexi Casillas - 2B
2. Joe Mauer - C
3. Michael Cuddyer - RF
4. Justin Morneau - 1B
5. Delmon Young - LF
6. Jason Kubel - CF
7. Craig Monroe - DH/LF
8. Mike Lamb - 3B
9. Adam Everett - SS

If we were somehow to land Hideki Matusi in a Santana trade, we could stick him in as DH/LF in the 5 or 6 spot. Not super imposing, but nothing to scoff at either.

Item 2: It's been a creeping suspicion of mine over the last several years, but I can definitively say that I hate Christmas music. Or more to the point, I hate most Christmas music. Or more to the point, I hate most Christmas music that's been written in the last fifty years. With a few notable exceptions (Mannheim Steamroller's Christmas album and Elvis' seminal "Santa Claus is Back in Town" amongst others) all that our culture has contributed to the cult genre of Christmas music is ooey-gooey syrup-laden bad Christmas tunes, either original or hack remakes of old songs that should have just been left as they were (I'm looking at you: R&B remix of "Frosty the Snowman"). I find myself increasingly crawling back into the safety of old (ye olde?) Christmas hymnals or folk carols ("Boar's Head Carol" and "'Twas in the Moon of Wintertime" are notable examples). They're good. They're classic. Nobody messes with them (presumably because most people don't even know what they are).

A particular subsection of Christmas music that REALLY bothers me is the use of those two movements from Tchaikovsky's "Nutcracker." You know the ones I'm talking about. The ones they use in the trailers of EVERY SINGLE CHRISTMAS MOVIE that comes out EVER!!!! That might have something to do with why I hated Tchaikovsky for so long. He's over played. Or more particularly, the "Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies" is overplayed to the point of vomiting. It is at times like these that I retreat to my apartment and lie in bed with a cup of earl grey and listen to Bob & Doug MacKenzie do their timeless rendition of "The Twelve Days of Christmas."

Bob: Hey hoser, what are the Twelve Days of Christmas? There's Christmas Day, right? And Christmas Eve, that's two. Now what comes after Christmas?
Doug: uh...Wrestling Day.
Bob: Get out.
Doug: Boxing Day, yeah yeah.
Bob: Ok so that's three. What comes after that? Nothin'!
Doug: New Year's.
Bob: Four
Doug: New Year's Eve.
Bob: Five. What else.
Doug: Um...there's two Saturdays and Sundays in there so that's four more.
Bob: Ok, so nine then.
Doug: And, uh, the other three, I believe, are the Mystery Days.